Thursday, 5 October 2017

2018 Costa Blanca Calendar - Torrevieja Outlook

Thank you Andy Ormiston for inviting us to the lovely tranquil setting of Aroca Seiquer & Asociados based in Rocajuna area for the presentation and launch of the Torrevieja Outlook 2018 Calendar which shows some of the wonderful tourist attractions in the Costa Blanca.





This is the calendar's 13th year of publishing which is done to help to support a number of very worthwhile charities.
 


A number of calendars were donated to us to help to support the Reunite International Child Abduction Centre charity and can be purchased from us for a very small fee of €5 (+ postage if applicable). All of which can be paid directly to our JustGiving page

 https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/onedaycloser-reunite

Before purchasing, let me know via IM or email your address so I can advise of any additional postage costs.




Monday, 25 September 2017

Reunite Walk 2017 - Stave Hill Ecology Park

Hi all

It was lovely to see all of you wonderful parents and families at the Reunite International Child Abduction Centre walk last weekend at Stave Hill Ecology Park.

Thank you to the staff at the park and the team at Reunite for hosting the event which on a personal note, I find to be very helpful and also enjoyable.


The main object of the event was to bring families and supporters together as the issues many parents and families face are very difficult to understand unless you or a family member have been affected.

More photographs can be found HERE

The assumption of the public is that parental child abduction and alienation is simply a domestic issue but the possible affects lay much deeper than this psychologically and sometimes physically.


These issues affect not only the absent parent. It also affects the families and the child. The tactics that are sometimes used to alienate a child can also result in deep and lasting issues for the child that the alienating parent claims to love.

I appreciate the work that Reunite do in helping to raise awareness of parental child abduction throughout the world and also the emotional support they give through their adviceline. It is very important to support organisations like this. 

If you would like to donate to the charity, any amounts would be appreciated to help to keep their adviceline alive and to assist in the very important work that they do.


Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity and make sure Gift Aid is reclaimed on every eligible donation by a UK taxpayer. So it’s the most efficient way to donate - I raise more, whilst saving time and cutting costs for the charity. 

Thanks all xx 

Tuesday, 22 August 2017

Patterns of behaviour in the family court

There are such obvious and common patterns in behaviour and "tactics" that are evident in many cases of parental child abduction and alienation.


When reading many articles/posts, it seems like they are all working from the same handbook of emotional abuse... In these cases why don't the courts and childcare "professionals" identify these patterns? If they do, why do they ignore them?

Why do they not hold accountable parents that resort to false allegations and perjury?

Why is the child not automatically provided emotional help in family law cases? They are the most important people and can only ever be winners if the parents can be amicable so why is mediation and shared parenting not the model that the courts encourage as priority?  Could this be for financial reasons?

 In mediation, if a parent shows that they are not prepared to work with the other parent in the best interest of the child, shouldn't sanctions be applied?

I know there is an arguement that an alienating parent may go through the motions for the benefit of the court rather than the child... but when breaches of memorandums of understanding are made, shouldn't the parent breaching those agreements be sanctioned in some way?

Sadly, parents can go through the court process and be let down in very similar ways.. 
We know the system is broken but yet we are still forced to use work with it (until we are forced to decide that it will get us nowhere in its current form and/or we just can't afford to progress matters through the court without draining us completely which is also draining our children's financial security).. 

Personally, I will continue to raise awareness in any way I can but unless parents and families stand together and highlight these issues, it will be difficult to apply enough pressure to prompt change.. 

Sadly, people accept things the way they are or judge the non-custodial parent with a thought of "no smoke without fire" without giving a second thought to the lies, deception, perjury and failure of the courts which brought things to this point.

Acceptance of spurious, malicious and cruel allegations and blatant perjury in the courts that we put our trust in to protect us and our children is abusive in itself . It can be a direct CAUSE of psychological issues due to emotional trauma and has even been linked to suicide, especially in men.

Please please please, review your processes. It is assisting the destruction of many families by aiding and abetting the alienation of children with half of their family as well as the emotional health of parents who will do whatever they can to be in the lives of their children.

- One Day Closer

Sunday, 30 July 2017

Reunite International Annual Walk - London 23rd September

Our flights are booked for Reunite International Child Abduction Centre annual Walk at Stave Hill Ecology Park in London on Saturday 23rd September.


This walk is all about getting parents, families and supporters together. Any sponsorship / monies raised is a bonus. However, if you do wish to sponsor me to help them support parents and families affected by parental child abduction, you can do so on my Justgiving page  

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/smd-reunite

If you would like to join us there, please contact reunite on : +44 (0)116 2555 345 or reunite@dircon.co.uk and let them know you would like to support them so they can estimate numbers. Thanks guys xx

Friday, 23 June 2017

Costa Blanca Lodge of Tranquility - Gentlemans Evening

On Saturday 10th June, we were very kindly invited as guests to a Gentleman's Evening with the Ladies (and their gentlemen) of the Costa Blanca Lodge of Tranquility No 52 at the beautiful Hotel Montepiedra.


The ladies of the lodge have supported Reunite International Child Abduction Centre in 2016 and 2017. Their kindness, hard work and generosity is greatly appreciated by all at Reunite as well as the many parents who contact the charity for help, support and advice.

The mediation service is a vital part of reunite and as such, they decided to use the generous donations in 2016 to make improvements to their two mediation rooms so they can provide parents with a comfortable, tranquil space when attending meetings and mediation.

The evening was very enjoyable and had the most amazing menu and surroundings. I would highly recommend this hotel for all who wish to stay here or organise an event in the future.

 
 

  
 
Sadly, representitives from Reunite could not attend the event this year, however, I was honoured to be able to give a speech about the charity and the work that they do on their behalf


 Thank you all for your continued support and friendship



Sunday, 18 June 2017

Father's Day Wishes

Happy Fathers Day this weekend..If you are blessed to be able to spend it with your children, treasure every single second.. xx



It really is so difficult and the emotions heighten even more on key dates... Please don't forget that parents who cannot see their children due to abduction and /or alienation ARE still daddies or mummies on these days. The difference being that it cannot be acknowledged by the children that they love with all of their hearts... Thoughts with all affected parents, grandparents, families AND of course, their children.... One day closer x


Tuesday, 6 June 2017

Costa Blanca Lodge of Tranquillity

Thanks to the fundraising efforts of the ladies of the Costa Blanca Lodge of Tranquillity, Reunite International Child Abduction Centre have now been able to give their mediation rooms some much needed attention.



These two rooms are used by parents when they come to mediate with them, so it is very important that they are comfortable, welcoming spaces that help parents to feel at ease.


They have made do with the rooms as they were for the last few years, but the money raised by the ladies gave us the resources to transform the rooms into genuinely pleasant places to be (as you can see from the photographs). 








In fact one parent who mediated with them recently said they were so comfortable they could happily have fallen asleep there!

So thank you again to the Costa Blanca Lodge of Tranquillity and the Honourable Fraternity of Ancient Freemasons for your much appreciated support.

This weekend, Michelle and I have the priviledge of being invited to their annual gentleman's evening here in Spain. Details to follow

 

Monday, 3 April 2017

Questions on Parental Child Abduction

1. My child has been taken abroad without my permission. What shall I do?

Contact the relevant central authority (in UK, ICACU, in Spain - Ministerio de Justicia), and Reunite International Child Abduction Centre for advice (www.reunite.org)

 

2. What documents are going to be required to support any court action?

Copies of the child’s birth certificate, your marriage certificate (if relevant), divorce order (again, if relevant) and any existing court orders relating to your child.

 

3.  What if I know my child has been taken abroad, but I don’t know where? 

This may involve Interpol, tipstaff officers and/or private detectives. If necessary, seek court orders to require banks, schools, telecoms companies, etc. to reveal the location of the abducting parent. 

 

4. Once you know the child’s location, what then? 

Court proceedings may then take place in the country where the child has been abducted to. They may be an order made to make the child "ward or court" and an order made to stop the child leaving the jurisdiction. The child's passport will also most likely be ceased.

There are guidelines over the amount of time a return order or decision should take (If signatories of Hague Convention / Brussels 2) . From experience, I can advise that this may not be adhered to and you could be facing a long, emotional, expensive legal battle. My advice would be IF AT ALL POSSIBLE, try to resolve matters amicably. Possibly with the help of mediation and counselling (ask Reunite about this). You are both parents EQUALLY. Your children are not possessions !

 

5. What happens if court solution is required (Hague)? 

Firstly, do your homework on who should be representing you. There are specialist lawyers in this area of law and can be very expensive. There are also self proclaimed advocates / heroes / warriors who will take prey on parents in such a vulnerable position. Take extreme care. They cannot provide the easy solution that they might claim to make and can cause more harm than good.

Ask if you will be entitled to legal aid assistance. One of the difficult decisions to make is who to instruct for representation. Reunite unfortunately cannot recommend specific legal professionals.

The abducting parent will be required by the court to appear before it to confirm whether s/he is willing to return the child. If not, the court will then set a date on which the return petition will be heard (which will include hearing evidence from the abducting parent as well as the parent left behind). 

 

6. Will my child’s opinion be sought? 

Provided the child is of any age that her views should be taken into account, this may be a requirement. The court may order social services / CAFCASS to interview the child (with interpreters if necessary) and – although this would not happen in all countries – the judge may also want to see and speak to the child. This is NOT a reason to coach and manipulate your child. Parental alienation IS an abuse. Your child should NEVER be subjected to this.

 

7. How long will it take for the court to give its decision? 

Every case is different, but some countries do not adhere to the "strict" time limits that international law dictates. Some countries are VERY poor at enforcing the international rules that govern parental child abduction. 

 

8.  What if the court rules my child should be returned? 

If the child is not then voluntarily handed back to you, a request may be needed for the police to remove the child from the abducting parent and deliver him/her to you. Even if the abducting parent appeals the return order.

------------------------
The contents of this blog post are the thoughts of the writer

 

Thursday, 23 February 2017

Dear Alienating Parent

Sadly, these tactics are used over and over again without deterrent or accountability for doing so...



Dear Alienating / abducting "parents"

You have proven your point that you can take "ownership" of your child by abducting and manipulating the system to achieve your goal in destroying the parental and family bond of the child and family that loves the child wholeheartedly.
You have proven that you can make false allegations, lie and deceive the courts and authorities in any way that you want to without any deterrent or accountability for doing so.
You have proven that you can portray a good parent to be an absolute monster and also coach your child in an attempt to have them believe your lies.
You have proven that you can use the system over and over again as long as the child's other parent and family do everything they can to be part of your child's life.
You have shown that you are prepared to emotionally harm your child and your child's family who love each other unconditionally.
Does this make you proud? Does it give you a feeling of accomplishment to not only abuse your child's family but also your child him/her self?
Do you realise that this can affect your child, that you claim to love for the rest of their childhood lives and even into adulthood? Possibly even for the rest of their lives?
Is this setting a good example for them being parents when they are older?
Do you realise also that when those children do start looking for answers, that the alienation that you are inflicting right now could cause your child to resent you.. and want to alienate you completely from their adult lives?
It is not too late to change your ways. Stop your abuse now.. Please.. For the sake of your child/children.

Anon (bound by gagging orders to "protect" the child from the truth)

Thursday, 16 February 2017

Gautam Gulati - RIP

It deepenly saddens me to report the tragic death of a loving father Gautam Gulati.


Gautam tried to do everything he could to be reunited with his daughter Zahra after she was parentally abducted from India by her mother and refused any access with his child.

The impact of this abduction was extreme on the whole family. Only a few months ago, Gautam had to cope with the tragic loss of his mother who he was very close to. This hit Gautam very hard.

Although Gautam was forced into the position of fighting through the courts in both jurisdictions, which was extremely stressful, he still took the time to try to support other parents who are so cruelly separated from their children. He was a very kind and special man who will be sadly missed.

I spoke to Gautam last Monday and he was so much more confident and positive that the appeals process was finally working in his favour to allow him to be reunited with his child. You can imagine how shocked and saddened I was to hear this news.

He, like many other parents who are affected by parental child abduction and parental alienation, was often frustrated, disillusioned in the system that he tried to put his trust in, and emotionally broken due to the help he pleaded for being ignored or dismissed. It hurt him terribly.




As yet, the cause of his death has not been confirmed.

I pray that one day, Zahra will know how much he loved her and fought for her. She has suffered a very tragic and perminent loss.

RIP Gautam x

Tuesday, 14 February 2017

Karen Woodall Blog


The lady seems to know and understand the issues so well. I have read many posts by her and I respect and agree with almost all. Keep up the excellent work Karen. One Day Closer xx

......"Parental alienation is NOT about conflict between two parents even though it may look like that from the outside to the naive or unaware professional, it is about the actions of one parent, often an unwell parent, who is causing the child to reject the other parent, which causes the rejected parent to feel upset, hurt, unheard and often angry that help is not available.

Parental alienation is NOT about parents acting badly it is about one parent acting badly and the other being drawn into a desperate struggle to save their relationship with their child.

Parental alienation IS child abuse and like all child abuse it is harmful to the child not to intervene AND stop it AND punish the perpetrator especially if that person will not stop it and cannot show insight into what they have done......"

https://karenwoodall.wordpress.com/2017/02/14/why-parental-alienation-is-child-abuse-and-why-punishing-such-abuse-can-never-rebound-on-a-child/

..

Saturday, 14 January 2017

Career Opportunity

Rewarding career opportunity advertised by Reunite International Child Abduction Centre.


Reunite International Child Abduction Centre is looking for an office administrator to assist with the smooth running of our city centre office.

The main focus of the role is too :
· Administer and manage the reunite mediation service
· Provide reception duties including staffing the administration line, welcoming visitors and managing emails
· Assist with fundraising events / seminars and general office administration
The successful candidate must be an excellent communicator with strong interpersonal and administrative skills, have plenty of common sense and be able to work as part of a small team.

Hours 9:30 am – 5:30 pm – Salary £18,200 per annum

Please send CV and covering letter to the postal address below..

Reunite International
Child Abduction Centre
PO Box 7124
Leicester
LE1 7XX
United Kingdom
Registered Charity No. 1075729

Closing date 31 st January 2017.

Skills you have will greatly needed by reunite International Child Abduction Centre, we hope that after you send your RESUME to Full time Office Administrator reunite International Child Abduction Centre, you can grow up your career.

Wednesday, 11 January 2017

January Parents Get Together

The date of Reunite's next parent's 'get together' is Thursday 19th January, in London.
 
If you would like to attend, please contact the Reunite office for details (reunite@dircon.co.uk)



All at reunite send you best wishes for 2017 and let's hope this is a positive year for all.

Thursday, 22 December 2016

Merry Xmas

Wishing everybody a happy & wonderful Christmas.

For those who are parents who are not able to see their children through abduction/alienation, my heart goes out to you and empathise with the hurt that you will undoubtedly be feeling.

Also so much thought for those who are suffering the bereavement of their children through illness or accident. It must be such a very traumatic time and must hurt so much in particular on these key dates.

Please stay strong and try to enjoy the season as much as possible with the people around you that are important in your life.

If you have your children / grandchildren with you this year, treasure every single moment with them. They will never be this age again.. You are very blessed..xx

Thank you to everybody that have stayed the distance, inspired me and helped me to stay focused and positive when I have needed it most. Also to the crazy loons I call friends who keep me smiling...

I really can't put into words how much I appreciate all that have given so much love and support. I'm blessed to have some amazing friends and family.

Love and best wishes!!! One Day Closer!! xx

Wednesday, 7 December 2016

2016 Thank you message

Thank you so much for your continued support in 2016. Our efforts and your kindness has now raised an amazing £6,222 in total for Reunite International Child Abduction Centre through One Day Closer. 



A special thank you to Costa Blanca Tranquillity Lodge, as well as the The Fire Station bar, Shani and Andy Ormiston, all the football teams competing in the Reunite International Shield including the singers who entertained in the evening events, those who supported my skydive and also a huge thank you to Michelle Clark who has been my rock during all of this. One more day closer...
https://www.justgiving.com/teams/reunite-spain



















Friday, 2 December 2016

Reunite - November News Roundup

At the beginning of the month, it was announced that the government has decided to opt in to the recast of the EU legislation known as the Brussels IIa regulation. The regulation outlines procedures to be used in cross-border family issues within the EU, such as the recognition of existing court orders and the abduction of children between EU states, and is currently being used by UK courts.


Reunite took part in the government’s consultation on the recast of Brussels IIa, and whether the UK should opt in to further discussions. They stated that the government shares their view that it is important for the UK to be part of the recast, even with Brexit on the horizon.

Reunite feel the impact of the proposed changes on families within the EU, including the families or British nationals living in other EU states, could be significant.

Reunite made a submission to the Justice Committee’s consultation on ‘the implications of Brexit for the justice system’ shortly following the announcement.

The EU’s Brussels IIa regulation is currently integrated into UK national law. Brussels IIa allows for orders in relation to parental responsibility to be recognised from one EU Member State to another, and adds extra obligations on Member States for the benefit of children in inter-EU 1980 Hague abduction cases.  

As a result, leaving the EU and potentially losing this key piece of legislation is going to have an impact on UK law and international family cases, and this needs to be taken into consideration by Parliament whatever happens next. 

Reunite hopes that their submission will be beneficial to the consultation and ultimately help to inform Parliament to make the best decisions for families and abducted children.

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On the 17th November, Reunite organised a parents get together in London. This was a great opportunity to have a chat and share experiences with other parents and a few members of the reunite team over a drink and some nibbles.

They organise these meetings every second month. If you would like to attend one of the future meetings, send an email to Mitta at reunite@dircon.co.uk who will send you further details.  

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Sadly, several new cases were reported during the month of November involving UK, Spain, Poland and Jamaica. Reunite aim provide ongoing advice and support to the parents who speak with them and work with them towards what will hopefully be a positive outcome for their children.

If you are affected by Parental Child Abduction and need advice, please call the Reunite International Child Abduction Centre advice line - 0044 (0)116 2556 234.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later in the month, Reunite hosted a seminar with the British Embassy in Seoul on the 1980 Hague Convention, with the aim of informing local lawyers about child abduction and how the 1980 Hague Convention works.

There were a number of speakers, who included the Hague Permanent Bureau, Judge Kim and Professor Suk from Korea, the Korean Central Authority, Justice Bennett from Australia, John Mellor of CAFCASS, Anne-Marie Hutchinson and our Reunite's Alison Shalaby.



Reunite hope that this seminar has helped to increase knowledge and confidence amongst professionals, in an effort to secure the best possible outcomes for the children in 1980 Hague cases.

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Also, late in November, Reunite's Sam Chapman attended the  Embassy Consular Conference, talking about the work of reunite with FCO's Consular Director, Julia Longbottom, and London's consular community.


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Here in Spain, we would like to offer our huge appreciation to the Costa Blanca Tranquillity Lodge for their continued support for the Reunite International Child Abduction Centre Charity. Through their efforts, they have raised approximately £1,500 that will be used towards updating the centre offices.
We would also like to give our best wishes and support to Shani Ormiston, who has supported the charity for a number of years through events and cd sales.


Her latest release "You Gotta Let It Go" can be seen on YouTube


It is also available on media download sites CD Baby (click here)  iTunes (click here) , Google Play (click here), Spotify (click here)

Wednesday, 30 November 2016

Shani Ormiston's new video for "You Gotta Let It Go"

A few weeks ago, we wished Shani Ormiston the best of luck with the launch of her new single "You Gotta Let It Go" which is available now on media download sites CD Baby (click here)  iTunes (click here) , Google Play (click here), Spotify (click here)



Shani has supported the Reunite International Child Abduction Centre charity for a number years now through her previous CD "Once Upon A Time" and also through a number of concerts/events in Spain.

As an update to the previous post, Shani has now produced a video for this song on YouTube and we would like to congratulate her and all involved for such an amazing job. It is brilliant!!

Watch Shani's video below.


Could I ask all to play and share her video as much as possible and give her the support she deserves?

You can also follow her on the links below:

https://www.facebook.com/shormiston/
https://twitter.com/Shaniormiston
http://shaniormiston.com/
https://www.youtube.com/user/ShOrmiston
https://plus.google.com/u/0/114400877961052495431

Monday, 14 November 2016

Parents Get-Together - London (UK) - 17th Nov - 6.30pm

Reunite will be holding an informal parent get-together this week if you'd like to join them.
This is a great opportunity to have a chat and share experiences with other parents and a few members of the reunite team over a drink and some nibbles.

They will be meeting on the evening of the 17th November in London, so if you'd like to join them please send an email to Mitta at reunite@dircon.co.uk who will send you further details.


Reunite submission to the Justice Committee

Reunite International Child Abduction Centre have been putting the finishing touches to their submission to the Justice Committee’s consultation on ‘the implications of Brexit for the justice system’.

http://ec.europa.eu/justice/civil/files/brussels_ii_practice_guide_en.pdf


The EU’s Brussels IIa regulation is currently integrated into UK law. Brussels IIa allows for orders in relation to parental responsibility to be recognised from one EU Member State to another, and adds extra obligations on Member States for the benefit of children in inter-EU 1980 Hague abduction cases.  

As a result, leaving the EU and potentially losing this key piece of legislation is going to have an impact on UK law and international family cases, and this needs to be taken into consideration by Parliament whatever happens next. 

Reunite hopes their submission will be beneficial to the consultation and ultimately helps to inform Parliament to make the best decisions for families and abducted children.

Tuesday, 1 November 2016

Busy October for Reunite

Reunite's CEO, Alison, was invited to attend the 2nd EuroAmerican Congress of Family Law which was recently held in Uruguay. She met with Judges, legal professionals, academics and organisations from a number of Latin American countries, including Uruguay, Argentina, Chile and Brazil.

There was an opportunity to discuss challenges faced in cases of parental child abduction and how reunite can work closer with key stakeholders across Latin America to benefit families and children.


Also in October, Reunite exhibited at the Resolution Dispute Resolution Conference in Nottingham. It was a great opportunity to speak with lawyers and other mediators about how beneficial mediation can be in international cases involving children, and to highlight the work of their advice line.


 Earlier in October reunite attended a conference in Moscow examining the use and enforcement of the 1980 and 1996 Hague Conventions in Russia.

The event was attended by experts from Russia and the UK, and examined how child abduction cases are treated in both countries. Reunite's Development and External Communications Liaison Officer Vicky spoke about the work of reunite including their advice line, mediation and policy work.

The conference was a great opportunity to learn about different aspects of the 1980 Hague system in Russia, and hopefully the information and experience shared will be of use to parents in the future.


Well done to all involved.  



Saturday, 22 October 2016

Reunite Senior Football League - Orihuela Costa

Following the success of this year's Reunite International Shield Football Tournament, Olaf Fett of the De Bassus - La Zenia team, who were runners-up, is calling for teams to start a soccer 8's senior league in support of Reunite International Child Abduction Centre.


If you are interested in playing for a team, or you have a team already established that would like to play in this friendly league, please contact Olaf at the de Bassus Bar and Restaurant at La Zenia (628 75 53 50 / 615 53 11 89 ) or email One Day Closer - onedaycloser.reunite@gmail.com